Merry PANKO Strength & Speed Christmas and 2011 Year in Review
It has been an incredible year at PANKO Strength & Speed. It started with the search for a new facility (it seemed like everyone was in everyone else’s lap in that old room) and ended with athletes attaining feats, raising the bar, setting records, conquering more, and destroying everything in their path. There was a lot in between and here are some highlights.
The first serious facility that was considered for the new Complex was actually a stone’s throw from the old one, about one half mile east. That all ended in one phone call. I spent three weeks, calling, inquiring, negotiating, and running numbers with the landlord. The landlord would not take my negotiation seriously. I found a realtor and had him inquire for me. That landlord was ENRAGED that I would “undercut” her “business, integrity, and intelligence, by bringing someone else in to negotiate” for me. She told me I “couldn’t get it done on my own, it was an insult to think I could bring someone else in to get it done.” I actually stayed on the phone with her for the seven minute drive from 465 to Metropolis, a feat in and of itself.
At the end of March, Emily and I took our last vacation as a childless couple. We drove to Myrtle Beach and left two inches of snow on the ground. Spring break was getting ready to start, we wanted to dodge the high school crowd and get away for four days. We arrived in Myrtle Beach to……37 degrees and flurries with morning sickness, a five-week pregnancy, and emotions. We went “economy” and stayed at the Mariner Motel, WHICH I AM SURE provides an ample bed for individuals vacationing in the summer and fall when there is no need to be in a hotel room. We arrived at 8pm, at check-in, there was a one sentence exchange on behalf of each party: Omar: “You should have been here last week, it was 70°.” Adrian: “Oh.” After 90 minutes of taking in the room, I decided we should attempt to find a “native” hangout and really assimilate with the locals in the bounty which was so graciously offered up by the Atlantic Ocean. Apparently, in resort towns, on a Sunday, nothing is open after 9pm (Pankos are not good vacationers) and after passing Outback Steakhouse four times I broke down and we ate ===>I didn’t drive 14 hours to eat at Outback. Midnight arrived, the toilet was wobbly and the floor grimy, and only one knob on the sink worked, the room had a stench and after enduring a tearful breakdown about facilities I decided it was time to go home. We closed our eyes for a few hours, packed up and drove home 14 hours. I learned a lot of lessons those two days, the most important of which was the Frisch’s Big Boy in Frankfort, KY north of I-64 has a pretty good salad bar.
The move to the new Complex was smooth and I was getting past landlord (I tend to have magnetic relationships with these people) issues out of the way. May 31st, 2011 was the last day as tenants at the old location. It was Memorial Day and I spent the morning cleaning the old space, tearing off window stickers and taking down the sign – the sign, being the trickiest part because is was at the top of a 45° inclined metal roof. Overestimating abilities and underestimating the circumstances is par for the course in technical endeavors. I pulled the car up parallel to the building, put the base of the ladder against the tires, and began my ascent up the metal roof in……flip flops (but I had to toe clamp going on so it was okay). I got the first bolt out and laid the corner of the sign on the roof. The second bolt came out smooth as well. Three quarters of the way out, I stopped and positioned myself to be able to “catch” the sign and set it down with my left hand while still holding on with my right hand. The last quarter turn came faster than I anticipated and I had no chance. The sign popped off the building slid down the 45° roof off the edge, took out the ladder, bounced off the car and landed under the awning, marooning me on the roof with no help in sight. I walked along the top of the inclined roof until it peaked and I had nothing to hold on to so I got on my hands and knees and crawled sideways underneath the Black Swan sign, my adductors were fried and my palms were soaked with sweat. I scooted my way down to the gutters at the bottom of the awning and decided against jumping onto one of the Black Swam picnic tables because it would break, I decided against jumping onto the deck because it was along way, and decided to jump into a bush. As I dangled my legs off to jump, Jamie (the owner of Black Swan) squealed into the parking lot, horn blazing, fetched and held the ladder so I could climb down.
But not everything that happened was featured in something resembling this:
PANKO Strength & Speed moved from 1,200 sq ft to 4,000 sq ft and from a 10 ft drop ceiling to 25 feet of airspace.
PANKO Strength & Speed upgraded from two multi-purpose racks to six collegiate power racks and six adjustable benches.
Before the move, there was 705 sq ft of turf; after the move there is 1900 sq ft of turf.
Two Texas Power Bars were added.
Two Super Yokes were added.
Two additional sleds were added.
An additional set of farmers walk implements were added.
Thirty additional power bands were added.
Two landmines were added.
Two additional thick bars were added.
Various handle attachments were added.
Three adjustable TRX-style straps were added.
Six powerlifting chains were added
Membership grew 100%!!
Summer 2011 proved to be the most successful for PANKO Strength & Speed athletes – the qualities of those athletes have been extolled and will be extolled ad infinitum because they EARNED IT. They trained in 114° heat because there is no AC. They pushed sleds until they couldn’t stand and did pull ups until they couldn’t hold up their arms. They committed to doing something they had never done and ended up achieving something even greater. The success stories, however, are not limited to the athletes who got their picture on the wall. EVERY athlete that walks through the door is a success story. They buy into the CARNIVORE Culture, they commit themselves, for themselves, to make themselves better. They don’t have to train at PANKO Strength & Speed they get to train at PANKO Strength & Speed, and their attitudes, drive, persistence, work ethic and sacrifice will take them farther in life, light-years farther than their talent. Along the way they will destroy every goal they set so they can reset a higher goals, keep supreme standards, and unparalleled expectations.
Mele Kalikimaka and Hauoli Makahiki Hou,
PANKO Strength & Speed, Proud Stewards of the American Dream
